Cynical Affirmations
$ 29.00
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📦 Ships Monday-Friday from Los Angeles
📅 Ships in 3-7 business days
Cynical Affirmations includes 52 mantras for the modern hellscape. Each affirmation card in this deck features a darkly funny affirmation that helps you laugh at our modern dystopia. If you're more of a storm cloud than a ray of sunshine, this is the affirmation deck for you!
Why you need it:
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52 darkly funny quotes which serve as an alternative to the trite toxic positivity featured in traditional affirmation decks — perfect for validating your contempt with the world.
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Adorable looks, cynical sentiments — the contrast between this deck's content and design will make you chuckle at the juxtaposition.
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Designed for display, this set comes with 52 distinct quotes printed on thick, high-quality card stock and a durable wooden stand for display. It's like investing in a set of 52 miniature art prints that you can rotate as the mood strikes.
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Wards off toxic positivity. Got a co-worker who constantly pops over to your desk to ask if you're "working hard or hardly working?" It's time to make them uncomfortable. Finally, the tables have turned, Linda!
- Makes a great gift for the dark humor lovers in your life
The inspiration behind Cynical Affirmations:
We've never found traditional affirmation decks relatable. The world is full of horrors, and telling us to focus on "good vibes only" often feels light gaslighting. Why can't we have a deck that meets us where we are? In the hellscape.
We wanted to create an affirmation deck for people like us. We created this set of darkly funny cards because they contain the kind of quotes that help us laugh at the modern dystopia. If affirmation decks that tell you to just be grateful make you roll your eyes too, then these cards are for you!
Product Features:
- 52 cards featuring 52 distinct quotes, along with our bunny and bird characters who are just as over it as you are.
- Stylish box that doubles as a decor item
- Display stand included so the cards of your choosing can sit on a desk, shelf, or entryway table
- Box measures 4.5" x 7" x 1"
- Cards measure 4" x 5"
What do you get when you shop Boredwalk?
😎 Stylish clothing and gifts that will definitely get you smiles, nods, and compliments from a secret society of other cool, likeminded humans. And some non-humans. Probably. 👽 😻
🗽 Clothing, gifts & accessories designed & printed in & shipped from the USA (California, to be precise).
🙌 The self-satisfaction of knowing that Boredwalk donates thousands to worthy charitable organizations every year. High fives all around! 🙌
👩🏽🎨 Knowing that you’re supporting a woman- and artist-owned small business creating rad jobs in the US.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Shopping with a company committed to delivering a 5-star customer experience.
🚚 FREE shipping on orders $65+ and FREE exchanges on U.S. orders.
📦 Shirts, kitchen towels, and bags are printed to order and ship in 3-7 business days.
😍 Printing on custom styles available upon request.
Our products are designed in and ship from the US
The tees, tanks, & fleece we print on are made of US-grown cotton, and some colors & styles are fully made in the USA! Our books and notebooks are made in the USA & Canada. Everything Boredwalk sells is designed in and shipped from our offices in southern California.
We create good jobs in our community with living wages
At our company ALL employees earn fair wages and have health care benefits, retirement benefits, paid holidays, and paid time off.
We support social justice organizations that reflect our values
Over the years our small business has donated thousands of dollars to organizations, such as ACLU, She Should Run, Planned Parenthood, 314 Action, and City of Promise.
My friend just got back to work after a 2 week vacation fucking around the country. She was not prepared for the 700 emails that followed. And then her birthday was a couple of days later. Having Cynical Affirmations has helped gently ease her back into reality in a comical and spot on way. It's almost like they have been customized into her specific feelings and place in life. I highly recommend this product to anyone who just needs to hear it. Whatever "it"is.
I hate media that tries to inspire me, to the point that it’s a running joke with my friends. I just hate feeling emotionally manipulated. Which means these are perfect! They’re all funny, snarky, and don’t feel like they’re trying to do anything other than make me smile when I see one
The perfect affirmations for someone who *wants* to be optimistic, but also understands the real world.
Perfect for the law firm office. Gotten so many compliments from people. The tone of the cards is perfect for those that want to remain positive but have to laugh at how things often turn out.