News
We're bringing hexy back 🧹
Why was Moby Dick so angry all the time? 🐳
HIS COUSIN FUDGY GOT ALL THE GIRLS
Happy National Fudge Day! Fun fact: fudge is actually a happy accident that was created thanks to a batch of messed up caramel. How serendipitous! As much as I love caramel, I feel like I've aged out of regular caramel consumption thanks to the proliferation of these pesky dental fillings and crowns. So fudge is a welcome alternative!
Stephen Colbert with some sage advice for today
Before we get to some funny links, let's celebrate a few June 16th birthdays!
- Prominent Apache leader and medicine man Geronimo, born this day in 1829! Geronimo was from the Bedonkohe band of the Apache tribe and led numerous raids against both Mexican and US forces that were encroaching on Apache lands in the southwest from the late 1840s through the late 1880s.
- Comic actor Stan Laurel, born this day in 1890! Mr. Laurel was one half of the legendary comedic duo Laurel & Hardy from 1927 until Hardy's death in 1957.
- Emmy and Tony Award winning actress Laurie Metcalf, born this day in 1955! Ms. Metcalf's most widely known role was as Aunt Jackie Harris on the sitcoms Roseanne and The Conners.
- Hip-hop icon Tupac Shakur, born this day in 1971! From stage to screen to recording studio, Mr. Shakur established himself as a leading voice describing the contemporary social issues plaguing inner cities, and as a symbol of activism against inequality.
- Finally, actor John Cho, born this day in 1972! Mr. Cho first started acting in the 1990s, but he gained fame thanks to his role as Harold Lee in Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle, and as the successor to George Takei as Hikaru Sulu in the recent cinematic reboot of the Star Trek film franchise.
Alright, let's get to some amusing links!
1. The occult origins of the dunce cap.
Despite its reputation as a symbol of stupidity, the dunce cap was actually conceived of by metaphysical thinker John Duns Scotus as a way to amplify knowledge. Wild!
2. Automation is coming for your jobs, pizza purveyors!
Few things in life fill me with as much joy as Rube Goldberg machines; convoluted mechanical contraptions designed to do mundane things. Check out this machine that wildly overcomplicates pizza making! It even feeds you (poorly) once the pie is made!
3. Tired: Kissing Booths. Wired: Hissing Booths.
I don't know about you, but I would be much more inclined to make a charitable donation to an angry feline than a strange human getting in my personal space with their bodily fluids.
4. All aboard the propane train!
This propane purveyor gets creative with their light box sign with new punny messages weekly. There are so many good ones, but I'm partial to "if attacked by a mob of clowns, go for the juggler."
5. Comedian Trey Kennedy would like to show you his mom's home decor.
Actually, he would like to show you ALL moms' home decor.
Did Home Goods throw up all over this apartment? Yes. Does Trey manage to make this platitude vomit hilarious? Also yes.
Boredwalk Community: News flash! Other people exist!
1. What's your actual day job and what's your dream day job?
My day job is to work on my YA novel about a high schooler punk rock girl who falls madly in love with a female jock classmate (unpaid — I'm on Disability but trying to make the most of it). When I was still able to work, I wrote copy for various websites, from travel sites to Pottery Barn. To that I say, "eh".
Dream day job? Play pro basketball.
2. What's your biggest pet peeve?
People who are oblivious of others. News flash! Other people exist!
3. What's a book you think the Boredwalk community should read?
Everything J.D. Salinger ever wrote. The Passion by Jeanette Winterson. Native Son by Richard Wright. The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky. Everything Toni Morrison ever wrote. (I could go on and on.)
4. What's the most useful piece of advice you've ever received?
I have the right to take up space (many women don't feel like they
can), make my voice heard, and set boundaries.
5. What experience do you most want to cross off your bucket list?
Visit Jigokudani Monkey Park!
6. If you could have any super power what would it be and why?
Super strength and the ability to heal my own body. I guess because chronic pain sucks and I'd love to have power over it.
7. You can curse your nemesis with a minor annoyance for eternity; what do you choose?
The curse of losing things constantly. "Where the f*%k are my glasses? My keys? My purse/bag?"
8. Where can the rest of the Boredwalk community find you?
FB under my name. I'm pretty private, though.