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Boredwalk Community: Low Expectations
1. What's your actual day job and what's your dream day job?
I'm a graphic designer. I know it's totally corny, but this IS my dream job. I have worked on some really cool, weird, and interesting projects throughout my career. But even if the project isn't glamorous, it's still fun for me.
2. What keeps you up at night?
OMG, climate change, racial inequality, income inequality, this election. The idea that we are hurtling toward the Great Filter (as described in the Fermi Paradox). (Ed. note: that's...pretty bleak. I'm here for it!)
3. What's a book you think the Boredwalk community should read?
I know I'm late to the party, but I highly recommend Samantha Irby's collections of essays*. Droll, charming, and relatable. #iloveher
*(Those collections are titled We Are Never Meeting In Real Life; Meaty; New Year, Same Trash; and Wow, No Thank You)
4. What's the most useful piece of advice you've ever received?
The key to happiness is low expectations. (Agreed!)
5. What is a surprising fact about you?
Many years ago, I was bit by Devo! One of the members of the band snuck up behind me, thinking I was someone else, and playfully (but sharply!) nipped me in the upper thigh. I was quite startled, uninjured, and ultimately kind of honored.
6. Where can the rest of the Boredwalk community find you?
I spend every minute of free time in the forest. I love nature; people not as much. I take some mediocre pictures while I'm out there and post them on Instagram @kuhdog.
THESE HIPPOS DON'T JUST CAST SHADE...THEY THROW IT, TOO!
Happy Redhead Appreciation Day! If your 16th chromosome happens to be graced with a mutated MCR-1 gene, get after it today, you fabulous ginger so-and-so!
September 23rd is also National Dogs In Politics Day. I don't really have anything else to add to that, other than it is VERY TELLING that the current occupant of the White House has no pets and continually uses the word "dog" as a pejorative descriptor for people he doesn't like. Meanwhile, his opposing applicant for the job has two very good boys, Champ & Major. I'm not saying that being a pet parent automatically equals being a top-notch President, but speaking as someone who routinely cleans up gross messes that occur outside of the litter box, it does entail a capacity for patience and persistent, unconditional love that probably comes in handy when dealing with Congress.
Boredwalk emails: come for the links, stay for the incisive political pet analysis! #BarkTheVote
Alright, let's eat some birthday cake!
• First up, cut an RBG-sized piece for Victoria Claflin Woodhull, born this day in 1838! Ms. Woodhull was a luminary of the women's suffrage movement in the U.S. and in 1872 became the first woman to run for President of the United States, with abolitionist Frederick Douglass nominated as her Vice Presidential running mate on the Equal Rights Party's ticket. She was a pretty controversial figure throughout her life, not just for the progressive stances of her youth, but also for the pretty conservative turn she took as she got older. That didn't stop her from also being the first woman to own and operate a successful stock brokerage and among the first to found a newspaper, Woodhull & Claflin's Weekly, which began publication in 1870. She was a pretty interesting woman, to say the least; look her up!
• Next, bop down a bite for legendary composer, bandleader, and saxophonist John William Coltrane, born this day in 1926! He's probably most well-known for the more avant-garde work of his later career, particularly A Love Supreme and Ascension, but my favorite albums of his are 1958's Blue Train and 1963's Ballads.
• Prefer soul to jazz? Perhaps you'd dig a little music from birthday boy Ray Charles Robinson, born this day in 1930! Popularly referred to as "The Genius", Mr. Charles famously liked all sorts of genres, and successfully synthesized elements of jazz, R&B, gospel, pop, and even country & western into something wholly unique — all while being blind since early childhood due to glaucoma.
• Finally, squeeze one last bite in for Bruce Frederick Joseph "The Boss" Springsteen, born this day in 1949! Keep that bite small, though — the noted fitness freak maintains a decades-long primarily vegetarian diet, still runs six miles per day and lifts three days every week in an effort to continue playing 2-3 hour-long concerts in his seventies without needing to be helped off the stage. Born To Run may have jump-started his stalled career, and Born In The USA may have made him an international superstar, but for my money it's all about Darkness On The Edge of Town and The River.
OK, link time!
Nothing says "you haven't made it, and you probably never will" like an adorable baby animal telling you "the world owes you absolutely nothing." From the mouths of babes, indeed!
2. The ageless wonder Paul Rudd has a message for his fellow youngsters: wear your damn masks!
I'm not sure what is more ridiculous: a handsome 51-year-old actor dressing and talking like a 26-year-old hype beast, or the fact that actual 26-year-olds are still walking around in public in 2020 not wearing face coverings. #CoinFlip
If you're unfamiliar, Ms. McConnell makes wonderful crafts and cakes with a decidedly macabre bent. Also, if you ARE unfamiliar with her, it's certainly not for lack of my trying, as it seems like I attempt to get more people to follow her at least once per quarter via these emails, our podcasts, etc. Meredith and I recently became Patreon supporters of hers, mostly because she'll need some scratch to decorate this massive new house she just acquired. I hope she uses that $5/month for something especially spooky!
4. Texas is full of vampires, and Fodor's certainly makes them seem more cuddly than cannibalistic.
Seriously — these generous goths are registered as a 501(c)(3) nonprofit who are involved in charitable work ranging from blood drives (naturally) to helping kids with medical needs, exotic animal rescue organizations & shelters, and domestic abuse prevention orgs. Talk about bleeding hearts!
5. Rick Beato dissects great songs from across genres and generations, and it's awesome!
Mr. Beato is a musician, producer, performer, and music theorist who regularly breaks down what makes great songs...well, great...in his YouTube series. If you've ever wondered why certain songs send a tingle down your spine but never understood exactly why, he's here to help you articulate that feeling!
I'm not crying, YOU'RE crying!
EVERYTHING IS TRASH (BUT...)
Happy Wednesday! Also, happy Mexican Independence Day AND National Guacamole Day! Now THAT is a 1-2 punch I can get behind!
Today is also National School Backpack Awareness Day. Hooray, I guess? Seriously, who is this holiday even for? Jansport and Eastpak's marketing department, I suppose. Still, though — what exactly are we meant to be "aware" of here? When I think back to my school days — aka, Peak Backpack Awareness, Matt Edition — I was mostly aware that "these straps are cutting off circulation to my arms" and "I should really make better use of my locker, because this thing is heavy AF."
Moving along, I hope you're wearing your eating pants because we've got a lot of cake to get through!
First up, alles gute zum geburtstag to Karen Horney, born this day in 1885! Ms. Horney was a German-American psychoanalyst whose primary claim to fame was exposing the inherent male bias in the Freudian analysis of women. Which is admittedly awesome, but it also is kind of ridiculous that it took an advanced degree to legitimize her claims when anyone with a copy of Freud's Studies on Hysteria and a pulse could have come to the same conclusion. Classic patriarchy — never change! (Don't worry, I know you won't!)
Next, send a slice across the table to legendary jazz guitarist Charlie Lee Byrd, born this day in 1925! Mr. Byrd's classical finger-picked style was heavily influenced by Django Reinhardt, but Byrd's career is most associated with the Brazilian bossa nova style popularized in the 1950s and 1960s by João Gilberto and Antonio Carlos Jobim.
Sticking with six-string slingers, happy birthday to Riley B. "B.B." King, also born this day in 1925! Besides his renown as a player, he was also an accomplished singer, songwriter, and producer, and is regarded as both one of the best blues guitarists of all-time and the most influential. Mr. King passed away in 2015 at the ripe old age of 89, and the thrill has been gone ever since.
Today is also the birthday of actor Mickey Rourke, born this day in 1952! Besides his starring roles in such classics as Diner, Rumble Fish, Angel Heart, and Barfly, he's probably best known for becoming a sex symbol opposite Kim Basinger in the film 9 ½ Weeks and then promptly destroying his handsome face with a four-year detour as a professional boxer in the early 1990s before his career comeback in the 2000s with The Wrestler, Sin City, and Iron Man 2.
Finally, a very illusory piece of cake is in order for David Seth Kotkin, aka David Copperfield, born this day in 1956! Little Matt once witnessed Mr. Copperfield make a facsimile of the Statue of Liberty disappear live on stage at the Patriot Center in the mid-1980s, but his most impressive magic trick is that he still looks exactly the same now as he did then. Presto!
OK, link time!
Skeptical? Here's a teaser quote from one of their recent posts: "Two-day-old spaghetti in bed at 3pm is the breakfast of champions." See? You'll love it!
2. Everything may be trash...but not these grapes!
Someone recently commented on one of our ads "are these supposed to be 2020-themed?" If there's one thing a seasoned Boredwalk fans knows, it's that everything was trash before Covid, and will continue to be trash forevermore. Thankfully, even trash pandas like this little masked marauder get a respite from the trash heap.
I'm always blown away by how certain artists can work so small...but then I'm also impressed with artists work in a really massive scale, too. I guess I'm saying I'm just impressed by artists in general.
2020 is still keeping it fresh in September! What will the rest of the year bring?
5. The Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards finalists were just announced, and I can't wait to see who wins!
MY money's is on Christina Holfelder's Yakking Penguin, but we'll have to wait until the winner is announced on October 22nd, so stay tuned!