November 08, 2023

ūü•ī That's me in the corner...

...THAT'S ME IN THE DUNCE CAP, TRYING TO GET SMARTER

It's a good thing we have some links to amusing content down below for you today, because the historical happenings for November 8th are pretty blah.
 
Actually, that isn't entirely true. There were some interesting tidbits sprinkled about, but I had to wade through a sea of "so-and-so was elected the such-and-such President of the United State on this day in XXXX" to find them.
Even today's random occasions are pretty underwhelming. National Cappuccino Day? Ugh. Be a latte or be gone. National Dunce Day? Look, the genesis of the word "dunce" and the guy it's named for makes for a giggle-worthy read, but let's not give stupidity more of a platform than it already has now that we are firmly planted in the Idiocracy timeline.
Exasperated Jean-Luc Picard GIF
See?! People are still stupid enough to elicit this reaction even in the relatively idyllic 24th century.
 
GIF courtesy of Star Trek: The Next Generation / Paramount
*****
Let's get on with it, then. At least there are some fun birthdays to celebrate on November 8th. Maybe yours! If it is, happy birthday! 
 
‚ÄĘ On this day in 1889 the great state of¬†Montana ‚ÄĒ aka Big Sky Country ‚ÄĒ was admitted as the 41st U.S. state.¬†Happy birthday, Montana!
 
‚ÄĘ In 1895, German physicist and mechanical engineer¬†Wilhelm R√∂ntgen discovered the X-ray¬†while experimenting with electricity.
 
‚ÄĘ In 1966¬†President Lyndon Johnson signed into law an antitrust exemption allowing the NFL to merge with the AFL.¬†I'm sure the negotiations involved with getting this done were entirely above board and not at all sus.
‚ÄĘ In 1972 American paid television network¬†Home Box Office (HBO) launched.¬†It is the oldest paid subscription network still in operation.
 
‚Äʬ†Birthday cake all around for:¬†Businessman and board game pioneer¬†Milton Bradley¬†(1836), Irish novelist and critic¬†Bram Stoker¬†of¬†Dracula¬†fame (1847), Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst¬†Hermann Rorschach¬†of inkblot test fame (1884), actress¬†Esther Rolle¬†of¬†Good Times¬†fame (1920), science fiction writer ‚ÄĒ and science fact journalist ‚ÄĒ¬†Ben Bova¬†(1932), singer-songwriter¬†Minnie Riperton¬†of "Lovin' You" and being Maya Rudolph's mom fame (1947), singer-songwriter & guitarist¬†Bonnie Raitt¬†(1949), actress¬†Alfre Woodard¬†of¬†Luke Cage¬†fame (1952), Japanese-British novelist¬†Kazuo Ishiguro¬†of¬†The Remains of the Day¬†fame (1954), New Zealand-English filmmaker¬†Richard Curtis¬†of¬†Love Actually,¬†Four Weddings and a Funeral,¬†Notting Hill, and¬†Bridget Jones's Diary¬†fame (1956), English songwriter and long-time guitarist of The Cure¬†Porl Thompson¬†(1957), British chef and swearing enthusiast¬†Gordon Ramsay¬†(1966), actress¬†Parker Posey¬†of... pretty much every major American indie film of the 90s fame (1968), Welsh actor¬†Matthew Rhys¬†of¬†The Americans¬†fame (1975), actress¬†Tara Reid¬†of¬†American Pie,¬†The Big Lebowski, and¬†Sharknado¬†franchise fame (1975), singer-songwriter & guitarist¬†Laura Jane Grace¬†of Against Me! fame (1980), and singer-songwriter¬†SZA¬†(1990)
‚Äʬ†Pour one out for:¬†Dentist, gambler, and gunfighter¬†Doc Holliday¬†(d. 1887). Dude survived The Gunfight at the O.K. Corral only to be felled by tuberculosis at the age of 36. Also dispense a tipple for painter and illustrator of swell Americana¬†Norman Rockwell¬†(d. 1978) ‚ÄĒ unless you are Boredwalk co-founder Meredith, who thinks he was a creep. Also shuffling off the coil today were Jamaican-American rapper¬†Heavy D¬†and¬†Family Circus¬†creator and cartoonist¬†Bil Keane, both departing this plane in 2011. Finally, phrase your tribute in the form of an answer for Canadian-American game show legend¬†Alex Trebek¬†of¬†Jeopardy!¬†fame (d. 2020).
 
Now on to the amusing links!
1. ūüėą¬†Get Ready With Tess...
 
...to summon a demon! You know, just #GirlyThings!
 
For more LOLs from our team be sure to follow us on our OG social accounts such as Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and/or Facebook.
 
 
Sustainability and climate activist Lauren Bash illustrates the importance of making sure you're focusing your social and environmental justice rage at the right targets. 
 
Comedian Akana perfectly portrays the exasperating process of trying to collect mail being held at the post office. We are big boosters of USPS and still ship the vast majority of Boredwalk's outbound packages with them, but this is painfully accurate. FWIW, UPS and FedEx aren't any better.
 
With so much shipping volume about to take place in the coming weeks, be sure to do your part by searching your email inboxes for shipment notification emails and monitoring the tracking of your holiday gift packages.
 
Brands are working hard to ship stuff out ASAP, but we don't know there's an issue until customers let us know, and missing packages are like missing persons ‚ÄĒ we have a much better chance of tracking them down and getting them re-directed to you the sooner it is after they're scanned as "delivered."
 
Writer Vanessa Chatterley's cat Henry is hard at work picking up tips and tricks from the internet to make the best biscuits ever.
 
5. ūüėĪ¬†Don't cross Jimothy
 
Think The Devil is scary? He's got nothing on his intern Jimothy.
OK! We'll be back here in your inbox on Friday ‚ÄĒ possibly with more nonsense holidays to dissect, more notable birthdays (and maybe even some notable deathdays!) to celebrate, and more witty content in general. Maybe even some *gasp* new art! Until then...

Peace, love, and cappuccino (I guess),

Matt