🤥 The lie I tell most often is...
IS THE REPLY I GIVE WHEN PEOPLE ASK HOW I'M DOING
It's Tell A Lie Day! I thought we'd all have this out of our systems on Friday with April Fools Day, but apparently the calendar wants to heighten our distrust of our fellow humans. Like I didn't already have plenty of that to begin with.
If you're going to partake, at least keep it to fairly innocuous "white lies" like "no, those bangs look great on you" or "I am sure no one even noticed how off-key your karaoke performance was last night."
Me when I'm invited to do anything involving karaoke or people or leaving the house.
Want some April 4th famous birthdays and historical facts? Let's get into it!
• Actor Heath Ledger was born on this day in 1979. Ledger appeared in 20 films during the span of his all-too-short career, including 10 Things I Hate About You, Brokeback Mountain, and The Dark Knight.
• Author and civil rights activist Maya Angelou was born on this day in 1928. Angelou published seven autobiographies, three books of essays, and several books of poetry during her career. She has received dozens of awards and more than 50 honorary degrees. She is probably best known for her autobiographical work I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings.
• Actor, writer, comedian, and TV host Eric André was born on this day in 1983. André has been a creator, host and co-writer on Adult Swim's The Eric André Show for the last 10 years.
• Actress, writer, director, and producer Natasha Lyonne was born on this day in 1979. Lyonne has appeared in too many outstanding TV shows and movies to mention here, but a couple of my faves include But I'm a Cheerleader and the Netflix original series Russian Doll.
• Comedian, actor, writer, and director David Cross was born on this day in 1964. Cross is probably best known for his work on Mr. Show and Arrested Development but he's worked on dozens of films and TV shows throughout the years.
It was also on this day in 1975 that Bill Gates and Paul Allen established Microsoft.
Lastly, it was on this day in 1850 that Los Angeles and San Francisco officially became cities.
Alrighty! Scroll on down to learn about fellow Boredwalk fan Kristin N.! If you'd like to be featured in our Monday Q&A segment, reply to this email and let us know — especially since we're out of new ones for future Monday emails after today!
We'll be back in your inbox on Wednesday morning with links to fun distractions! If you're in a shopping mood, be sure to use the code YAY10 at checkout to save 10% on orders of $100 or more! Until next time...
Peace, love, and white lies,
Kristin waiting for the biggest of sleeps in her Someday We'll All Be Dead tee!
(Disclaimer: Kristin would like you to know that the pipe is unfilled and
unlit and merely a prop to keep her from chewing on her fountain pens.)
1. What's your biggest pet peeve?
My biggest pet peeve is the question, "are you happy?" I mean... do you mean at this very moment? All the time? On average? What will knowing this change? Is it possible to be happy all the time? Would it even be happiness at that point? Wouldn't constant joy be tiring?
My second biggest pet peeve is the question "What's your biggest pet peeve?" What counts as a pet peeve? Can it be something everyone would find annoying? Can it be something that causes me rage? Or does "pet" imply a small, if frequent, irritation?
No. I think my biggest pet peeve is my propensity to overthink.
2. What's a book you think the Boredwalk community should read?
If I had to recommend a book to the people that buy Boredwalk shirts (the *best* kind of people), I would recommend Stiff by Mary Roach, Last Breath by Peter Stark, Hollow Kingdom by Kira Jane Buxton, or Lamb: the Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore. All four of which are dark, funny, and thoughtful.
3. If you could have any super power what would it be and why?
I would love my super power to be the ability to know why. Why something happened, or why it behaves or feels the way it does. It may be distressing to know, sometimes, but if I could choose to use the power or not, that would solve that problem sometimes... Think of all the future problems that could be solved if we knew why things happened previously! Mostly, it is because "why?" is one of the driving forces in my own life.
4. You can curse your nemesis with a minor annoyance for eternity; what do you choose?
I would curse my nemesis with the removal of just one of the tastebud types on their tongue. It would throw off their enjoyment of food entirely, simply by unbalancing it. Food is such a joy... I can't imagine.
5. What experience do you most want to cross off your bucket list?
If I were to narrow my bucket list down to just one thing it would be to do an onsen tour of Japan with my husband. Not sure if that will ever happen, as I am inked now, and most of the major onsen sound like they are still tattoo-averse. I can dream, tho.
(Editor's note: Onsen is the term for the naturally occurring hot springs around Japan and the bathing facilities and traditional inns surrounding them. How relaxing!)
6. What is a surprising fact about you?
I was arrested for bringing a 1980s Costco-size bottle of Sudafed — no blister packs; just a bottle of 400 (or something) little red pills — into Japan. I suffered from frequent sinus issues, and had been bringing them in every time I returned to the States for a visit, but one time the customs guys caught me, and I was cuffed before I could blink. I had no idea that it was used to make meth... I found out later that the Japanese invented meth. I was such a naive kid. It does make for an interesting story time when I am being questioned by counsel during jury selection. :-)
7. Clear up a misconception (about your job, where you are from, some other topic you know a lot about).
Not everyone who works in tech has been in tech their whole lives. I went to college twice, once for music (vocal) and once for medieval English literature. Now I do ops. Had someone told college-age or younger me that I would work with computer systems, I'd have laughed until I cried.
8. Where can the rest of the Boredwalk community find you?
Currently I can be found working from my home in Southern California (I believe I have been training my entire life for the past two years of quarantine), or wandering various parks and cemeteries feeding crows and squirrels.