November 28, 2022

This is it! Last call for Cyber Monday savings! 🤑


It may interest you to find out that the REAL reason for the season (or at least November 28th) is to celebrate National French Toast Day. Huzzah!

You know what makes for excellent French toast batter? Nog. How timely! Anything that cuts down on food prep this time of year is a win in my book.

You know what indisputably ruins French toast? Dressing it with anything other than maple syrup. Keep your chocolate drizzles and fruit compotes off my plate and save that sh!t for those trashy** pancakes that need all the help they can get — the adults are eating.
** This is obviously a joke; I adore pancakes. But ever since we "lost" a subscriber over our (read: my) savage takedown of noted crowd-pleaser scrapple*** a few weeks back, I'm now finding it extremely difficult to ignore the impulse to insult a different beloved food in every email I send you, dear reader. In fact, I now take it as a challenge.
*** LOL, look, if you love scrapple, more power to you — don't let some rando on the internet yuck your yum in pursuit of cheap laughs — but let's not kid ourselves about it being a popular delicacy beloved the world over. No one has ever said "eh, I'm not really in the mood for loaded fries or nachos, but I could really go for some scrapple."****
**** OK, maybe SOMEone has uttered that phrase before, but I doubt it, and the footnotes in this email are getting out of hand. We've had enough supply chain shortages the last three years; I don't want to be responsible for the Great Asterisk Shortage of 2023.
Chocolate drizzled French toast GIF

What did I JUST SAY about chocolate drizzles on French toast?!  



Want a few famous November 28th birthdays and historical facts? Of course you do!

• On this day in 1912, Albania declared its independence from the Ottoman Empire
• In 1925 the Grand Ole Opry begins broadcasting in Nashville, Tennessee as the WSM Barn Dance
• In 1960 Mauritania became independent from France (at least the French had that delicious toast to cry into)!
• German-English philosopher, economist, and journalist Friedrich Engels was born this day in 1820. Lover of beards, loather of capitalism. Bet he'd adore Cyber Monday!
• In 1929 songwriter & producer Berry Gordy, Jr., founder of Motown Records, was born.
• In 1943 songwriter Randy Newman was born. You've got a friend in him!
• Feminist novelist, poet, and screenwriter Rita Mae Brown was born this day in 1944. If you haven't read Rubyfruit Jungle, are you even trying to get a minor in Women's Studies?
• Soundgarden/Pearl Jam drummer Matt Cameron was born this day in 1962
• Today is also the birthday of actor Judd Nelson (1959), comedian & television host Jon Stewart (1962), model & actress Anna Nicole Smith (1967), and rapper & entrepreneur Chamillionaire (1979)
Pour one out for:
• Short story writer, essayist, and historian Washington Irving, who died this day in 1859, but not before blessing us with his famed tales 'Rip Van Winkle' and 'The Legend of Sleepy Hollow'
• Canadian-American physician and educator James Naismith, who invented basketball and died this day in 1939
• Canadian-American actor/producer Leslie Nielsen, who shuffled off this mortal coil in 2010. Whatever you do, don't call him Shirley! 
Alright! No Q&A this week, since this is already a pretty long email, but if you'd like to be featured in an upcoming Monday email (and are a customer with some Boredwalk tees, tanks, hoodies, towels, bags, or books to show off), just reply to this and let us know, and we'll send you some fun questions to answer (along with our undying gratitude)!
We'll be back here in your inbox on Wednesday with some more random holidays to observe, historical tidbits to acknowledge, and fun links to entertaining content! Until next time...
Peace, love, and chocolate-free French toast,