MY REACTION WHEN PEOPLE GREET ME WITH "HOW ARE YOU?" 😒

This is normally the part of the email where I tell you what weird national observance coincides with today's date on the calendar. Instead I'd like to propose a new occasion.We can call it National Don't Ask "How Are You" Unless You Mean It Day.

Okay, that's a mouthful, but I am running low on creative energy, so that's the working title.

Dear reader, I am horrible. Most people seem to be right now. Everything feels extremely bleak in the world, and you if you're already a person who tends towards a gloomy disposition, it's a lot. So please — dental office assistants, vendors, salespeople in my inbox — please stop asking how I am. I don't want to get into it and I don't want to pretend everything is fine. I am barely holding things together, please do not poke the impending breakdown.

This is me on the inside right now, while still trying to appear to go about my day.

Anyway, I did look up what everone else considers "occasions" today, and the first thing that popped up: Feast of the Ass Day! I wish I were making this up. Look, this whole decade has been a feast of ass. No more please, I am full.

It's also National Dress Up Your Pet Day, so I guess do that if your pet is into it. Whatever it takes to distract ourselves from our painful shared consciousness, right?

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Famous birthdays? Coming right up.

 • Rapper, producer, and actor  LL Cool J, born today in 1986! I hear he needs love. Don't we all?

• Actor, director, and producer Jason Bateman, born in 1969! (And still somehow boyishly adorable.)

• Foo Fighter Dave Grohl, born today in 1969! This Bateman birthday twin will never be your monkey wrench!

• Actress Faye Dunaway, born today in 1941!

• Ancient Roman politician and loverboy of Cleopatra Mark Antony, born today in 83 BC!

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Alright! We'll be back in your inbox Monday with a new Boredwalk Community Q&A, more famous birthdays, a random holiday or two, and other assorted entertainment! Until next time...

Peace, love, and nightmares,

Meredith