December 18, 2023

"Will it get here by Christmas?" 🤔

Boredwalk Bestsellers 2023


Happy National Twin Day! Shout out to my brothers Rob & Tom, who are fraternal twins AND about to celebrate their shared birthday eight days from now! After three-ish decades you would think they'd have gotten over receiving Christmas/birthday combo gifts from their cheap older brother... but you'd be wrong. Maybe I should send them each a Grievance Journal to complain about it in?

Speaking of which, it is crunch time here at Boredwalk HQ. We are working feverishly today and tomorrow to get as many orders packed up and handed off to USPS as possible to make some holiday miracles happen (even for the procrastinators who don't deserve it).

If you count yourself amongst said procrastinators, please don't dawdle and just order some of our books and/or Delve Decks right now so we can get them out the door as quickly as possible. You can still order our tees, towels, tank tops, bags, or sweatshirts of course, but I would not count on them to arrive before next Monday at this point. I mean, anything can happen — they might — but it's kind of like expecting Joe Flacco to come out of retirement* and be a productive quarterback for the Cleveland Browns. It's something of a... what's the term I'm looking for... ah yes: a Hail Mary. 

* Technically he wasn't "retired," but being a 38 year-old QB sitting un-signed at home halfway through the season also doesn't scream "gainfully employed."


Homer Simpson hail mary long shot GIF

I kid because I love, Browns fans. You've suffered plenty and deserve nice things!

GIF via The Simpsons / FOX


Be sure to use code SAVE15 at checkout for 15% off orders of $95 or more, and don't forget that U.S. shipping is FREE for orders of $75 or more!


Alright! Let's kick off the week with a few famous December 18th birthdays and historical facts:

• In 1892 Tchaikovsky's ballet The Nutcracker was performed for the first time in Saint Petersburg, Russia

• In 1932 the Chicago Bears defeated the Portsmouth Spartans in the first ever NFL playoff game to win the NFL Championship. 

Birthday cake all around for: Actor & filmmaker Ossie Davis of Do The Right Thing, Grumpy Old Men, and Bubba Ho-Tep fame (1917), English singer-songwriter, guitarist, and indestructible rock 'n' roll pirate Keith Richards of Rolling Stones fame (1943), South African anti-apartheid activist Steve Biko (1946), filmmaker Steven Spielberg (1946), lead guitarist Elliot Easton of new wave legends The Cars (1953), actor Ray Liotta of Field of Dreams and Goodfellas fame (1954), actor Brad Pitt of Moneyball fame (1963), pro wrestler and beer enthusiast Stone Cold Steve Austin (1964), Australian actress Rachel Griffiths of Six Feet Under fame (1968), actor Casper Van Dien of Starship Troopers fame (1968), rapper & actor DMX (1970), Australian singer-songwriter Sia (1975), actress Katie Holmes of Dawson's Creek and Go fame (1978), singer-songwriter Christina Aguilera (1980), and singer-songwriter Billie Eilish (2001)

Pour one out for: Legendary comedian and actor Chris Farley of Saturday Night Live, Tommy Boy, Black Sheep, and Beverly Hills Ninja fame (d. 1997), British singer-songwriter Kirsty MacColl of "Fairytale of New York" fame (d. 2000), animation icon Joseph Barbera of Hanna-Barbera fame (d. 2006), actress & producer Majel Barrett of Star Trek and Star Trek: The Next Generation fame (d. 2008), and Hungarian-American actress & socialite Zsa Zsa Gabor of Moulin Rouge, Touch of Evil, and Queen of Outer Space fame (d. 2016)


OK, scroll on down to learn a bit about fellow Boredwalk fan Kelly! If you're feeling even moderately outgoing and would like to be featured in an upcoming Monday email (and are a customer with some Boredwalk tees, tanks, hoodies, towels, bags, books, or Delve Decks to show off), just reply to this and let us know and we'll send you some fun questions!

We'll be back here in your inbox on Wednesday with some more random holidays to observe, historical tidbits to acknowledge, and fun links to entertaining content! Until next time...

Peace, love, and for-the-love-of-cats-stop-procrastinating-and-order,



Kelly looking cozy in her Have The Day You Deserve hoodie

Kelly looking cozy in her Have The Day You Deserve hoodie!

• What's your dream job?

My dream job would be a public health research librarian. I love constantly reading and learning new things; connecting people with information, tools, and resources; and sharing the field of public health with new folks.

• What's your biggest pet peeve?

When people eat loudly. There is seriously no need for slurping, smacking, gobbling, guzzling, munching, or any other ridiculous noises. PLEASE NO!!!

• If you could have any super power what would it be and why?

My superpower of choice would be teleportation. It would be awesome to be able to see my favorite people and friends more frequently and to be able to attend all the important moments in people's lives. Also, I have had an average of a three-hour round-trip commute to work for most of my adult life, so it would be awesome to eliminate that!

• You can curse your nemesis with a minor annoyance for eternity; what do you choose?

A pesky eyelid twitch that lasted every day for all waking hours.

• If you could make a mundane wish (meaning, a wish for something seemingly inconsequential that you still believe would benefit you immensely), what would it be for?

My mundane wish would be to eliminate other folks' need to fill silent times with small talk, because… silence is okay! Mindless small talk takes my "peopling gauge" from F to E in two minutes.

• What is something you wish you could go back in time and say to your younger self?

Embrace who you are and not attempt to conform to the environments around you. Your people are out there, and you will find them. Be you and be proud of all of the pieces of you.