A GAME OF HIDE-AND-GO-SHRIEK!

Happy Frankenstein Day! It was on this day in 1797 that Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley was born, and only 21 years later was her early science fiction masterpiece first published. How precocious!

Today is also National Toasted Marshmallow Day! I bet were it not for the required proximity to fire that ol' Frankenstein's monster* would've loved a well-constructed s'more. 

*All the cool kids know that Victor Frankenstein was the real monster. Stop playing god, Vic!

You think he's excited now; wait till he gets a load of graham crackers, chocolate, and a gooey mallow!

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Before we delve into this week's community Q&A, let's celebrate some OTHER notable August 30th birthdays! 

Happy birthday to prolific actor and singer Fred MacMurray, born this day in 1908! Mr. MacMurray appeared in over 100 films and a successful television series over the course of his half-century long career, including film noir classic Double Indemnity, The Apartment, The Absent-Minded Professor, The Shaggy Dog, and My Three Sons. 

Happy birthday to Theodore Samuel "Teddy Ballgame" Williams, born this day in 1918! Mr. Williams was a 19x All Star, 2x AL MVP, and 2x Triple Crown winner for the Boston Red Sox over the course of his storied baseball career. To this day he remains the last MLB player to finish a season with a batting average over .400 (.406 in 1941). He's also one of the more famous people to have had their remains cryogenically frozen upon their passing. Seems like Teddy Ballgame's fam has some Frankenstein-y plans of their own!

Today is also the birthday of comedic curmudgeon Lewis Black, born this day in 1948! Mr. Black is a popular stand-up comic who has also been a The Daily Show contributor since way back in the Craig Kilborn days. He has also served as an "ambassador for voting rights" for the American Civil Liberties Union since 2013.  

Finally, happy birthday to actress, producer, and model Cameron Diaz, born this day in 1972! Ms Diaz has appeared in The Mask, She's The One, My Best Friend's Wedding, A Life Less Ordinary, and There's Something About Mary, among other films. 

OK! Assuming I don't die before then, I'll be back in your inbox on Wednesday morning with links to fun distractions! Before that, though, scroll down and learn all about fellow Boredwalk fan F.J. P.! As usual, if you'd like to be featured in an upcoming email, reply to this and let me know! Until next time...

Peace, love, and monstrous mallows,

Matt

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F.J. looking suspiciously rested & relaxed in his Everything Is Terrible tee!

1. What's your day job and what's your dream job?

I am a recently retired TV comedy writer. I put in my 30 years and decided to call it a day. I was fortunate enough to write for all the broadcast networks and be on the writing staffs for Frasier, Ellen, Less Than Perfect, and Sullivan & Son. From my professional relationships, I fell into my dream job: professor at USC in the Cinematic Arts Department. For the last seven years, I have been teaching the next generation of comedy writers. Based on what I have seen, the future of comedy is very bright.

(Ed. note: this is excellent news, because I sure as heck am not gonna make it to my own retirement without some LOLs to distract me from **gesticulates wildly all around** this sh!t show.)

2. What keeps you up at night?

I usually wake up in the middle of the night pondering all the big philosophical questions of life: Who am I? What is my purpose? Hotdogs: sandwich or not a sandwich?

(Filling between two halves of bread, regardless of them being conjoined on one side, constitutes a sandwich in my book.)

3. What's a book you think the Boredwalk community should read?

I just re-read the autobiography of the late, great Charles Grodin, It Would Be So Nice If You Weren't Here. Grodin is a wonderful storyteller about his life in show business. It is equal parts hysterical and inspirational about living a life in the arts. It's out of print, but you can find it on eBay.

("It would be so nice if you weren't here" is essentially the mantra running in the background of my mind every time I leave the house and interact with other humans. I'll need to check this out!)

4. What experience do you most want to cross off your bucket list?

Throwing a pie in a network executive's face during a scripts notes session. I just want to do it for life-long bragging rights.

(But what KIND of pie? This is an important consideration. The crunchy top of a pecan pie would probably hurt more, but a blueberry pie would likely ruin whatever suit they're wearing forever. Decisions, decisions!)

5. If you could have any super power what would it be and why?

I guess I'd have to say teleportation. I mean, honestly...have you seen what a First Class airline ticket goes for these days?

6. You can curse your nemesis with a minor annoyance for eternity; what do you choose?

I would curse my nemesis with the annoyance of being interrupted every time they opened their mouth. We all know "interrupters." Kind of annoying, right?

7. If you drink: what's your go-to drink? If you don't drink: what's your go-to dessert or snack?

I would have to say a Hendrick's gin martini. I have to pick that drink. It's a law from the WGA.

8. What's a surprising fact about you?

A lot of people think I'm joking when I tell them this...I am an Eagle Scout.

9. Where can the rest of the Boredwalk community find you?

On Instagram @fj.pratt